im completely traumatised. since i was told about it yesterday, i refused to believe it was true. it too surreal. this is someone i know, someone who was once close to me, someone who was my friend. though we drifted apart after secondary 2, i always remembered having this friend. i've been hoping that this was just a rumour, a nightmare, a miscommunication or whatever. but its not. its been verified.

but why. why did she have to do this. at 20. you usually hear of people committing suicide all the time and it seems such a norm that you just brush it off. but i never expected this to be someone whom i know. whom i had relations with. whom i didnt use to just consider a schoolmate but a good friend. whom i was in the same clique with. why did she have to do it? and having to send her off on this mother's day?

i never kept in contact with her for the past 6 years, and i will never be able to that again. i cant even make it to say the last goodbye.

may God's peace be with her and her family.