Etc.

I think ive lost count of how many hours ive slept over these past 2 days. Plenty i know, but its just sufficient to make up for the only 11 hours of 40 winks i managed to catch in the past 5 days. My body isnt aching as badly right now as it was on Fri, but i think it still needs some respite. Thank goodness for an off day today. Im really quite sick of Studio 4 already.

Anyway, the past week's shoot was another whole new experience for me. It has further reinforced the fact that learning is forever unlimited and that knowledge and skill is certainly boundless. My 2 semesters in 2nd year doing studio shoots only got me as far as being familiar with the crew roles and basic studio shoot procedures. Most of my 5 days was spent trying to catch up with what was happening, getting lectured, multi-tasking and attempting not to be the black sheep in the crew. My inexperience was definitely apparent, and my flaws were strewn all over the floor for everyone else to test their patience. I swear i'd never felt so incompetent and daft before, but i really didnt have time to seek respite in tears.

The stress of doing studio shoots was undoubtedly much more substantial as compared to location ones. The sheer number of people involved was already enough to do you in should you be responsible for committing a mistake or straddling in hesitation. Teamwork, while offering a sense of support and satisfaction, could also double as a lethal force on the mental and psychological faculties. By Wed, i was already breaking down hard, and while over the days the familiarity of the process grew on me, i still found myself struggling to keep my sanity intact. I kept contemplating if this industry was right for me, and by the end of the week, decided that i should seriously reconsider my choice before it was too late. I dont know if this is the result of an entire week's accumulation of mental, physical and psychological exhaustion. Perhaps it is. Because after a weekend of rest, reason is now reminding me that this is what i have chosen and that if i were to surrender so easily, regret would haunt me for the rest of my life.